Last Post of the Year

So at the end of every year, everyone starts asking "what's your New Year's resolution?" I usually don't have an answer, because I've failed so many New Year's resolutions in the past that I just don't bother anymore. I mean, sure, there are things I'd like to do, but to actually resolve to do them tends to lead to disaster.

However, the one thing I would really like to do, and have been trying to make myself do, is spend a little bit of time each day doing something I want to do, just for the sake of wanting to do it. I love scrapbooking, I love crafts, I love watching TV (beyond Spongebob Squarepants), and I love reading, but I very rarely get to do any of the above because I'm busy enough with taking care of 2 kids, a husband, and a home. So if I were to "resolve" anything for 2011, it would be to spend more time doing the things I love, even if it means pushing laundry off yet another day.

This lead me to another desire I have had for years. As an avid reader, I like to think I've read everything that's worth reading (naturally...); however, an area where I am sadly lacking is classic literature. Not to say I'm completely in the dark-- I have a working familiarity with many classic novels, and have done the required school readings of "To Kill a Mockingbird," "The Great Gatsby," "Catcher in the Rye," etc. I even liked a few of them. But even the few that I've liked have failed to motivate me to keep reading, mostly because I think it's a snore-fest genre that can't possibly keep me interested. I've gone to the library in search of classic novels to finally sit down and delve into, just to say that I did, and have come home instead with mysteries, memoirs, and chick-lit. I have yet to really push myself harder and make myself accept the fact that there is a world of literature beyond Stephen King and Jen Lancaster. (Although I reserve the right to still think both of them are awesome.) (Just saying.)

Which is why, for the first time in years, I have made a New Year's resolution. I am embarking on a project, to read a classic novel/novella every week for a year; that is to say, 52 classics. It is a lofty goal, but I think I can accomplish it if I really push myself. It's not the actual reading that will be the hard part-- I have been reading since I was very young, finished "Charlotte's Web" for the first time when I was 4, and can get through an average 500-page book in 2-3 days if it keeps my interest. The hard part will be keeping my interest. I refuse to give into the temptation of watching the movies based on these books until AFTER I have already read it (with the exception of movies I've already seen, but I deliberately picked books that either I have forgotten the movie or, in the case of "Alice in Wonderland," believe there MUST be more to the story than Disney eluded to...)

I intend to blog about each book as I finish it, to keep myself on track so that I don't let my goal slip away. So here, in no particular order, is a list of the 52 books I intend to read in 2011:

1. Alice in Wonderland- Lewis Carroll
2. Anne of Green Gables- L. M. Montgomery
3. The Black Arrow- A Tale of Two Roses- Robert Louis Stevenson
4. Emma- Jane Austen
5. Les Miserables- Victor Hugo
6. Pride and Prejudice- Jane Austen
7. A Tale of Two Cities- Charles Dickens
8. Wuthering Heights- Emily Bronte (*note: have already read this, but I was about 14 at the time, so I feel I can probably gain a LOT of understanding from rereading...)
9. The Time Machine- H. G. Wells
10. The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde- Robert Louis Stevenson
11. Sense and Sensibility- Jane Austen
12. Oliver Twist- Charles Dickens
13. The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym of Nantucket- Edgar Allen Poe
14. The Legend of Sleepy Hollow- Washington Irving
15. The Island of Doctor Moreau- H. G. Wells
16. The House of Seven Gables- Nathaniel Hawthorne
17. Jane Eyre- Charlotte Bronte
18. Great Expectations- Charles Dickens
19. The Call of the Wild- Jack London
20. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn- Mark Twain
21. The Beautiful and Damned- F. Scott Fitzgerald
22. Dracula- Bram Stoker
23. The Prince and the Pauper- Mark Twain
24. A Room With a View- E. M. Forster
25. Phantom of the Opera- Gaston Leroux
26. Twice Told Tales- Nathaniel Hawthorne
27. Anna Karenina- Leo Tolstoy
28. The Hunchback of Notre Dame- Victor Hugo
29. The Moonstone- Wilkie Collins
30. Tess of the d’Urbervilles- Thomas Hardy
31. The Scarlet Letter- Nathaniel Hawthorne (*see note from "Wuthering Heights")
32. The Tenant of Wildfell Hall- Anne Bronte
33. The Jungle Book- Rudyard Kipling
34. The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes- Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
35. The Jewel of Seven Stars- Bram Stoker
36. Gone with the Wind- Margaret Mitchell
37. Rebecca- Daphne du Maurier (*and again...)
38. Nine Stories- J. D. Salinger
39. Little Dorrit- Charles Dickens
40. On the Road- Jack Kerouac
41. The Sun Also Rises- Ernest Hemingway
42. Don Quixote- Miguel de Cervantes
43. As I Lay Dying- William Faulkner
44. The Picture of Dorian Gray- Oscar Wilde
45. The Haunting of Hill House- Shirley Jackson
46. Bleak House- Charles Dickens
47. The Age of Innocence- Edith Wharton
48. Sister Carrie- Theodore Dreiser
49. Vanity Fair- William Makepeace Thackeray
50. Watership Down- Richard Adams
51. The Song of the Lark- Willa Cather
52. The Princess and the Goblin- George MacDonald

Now that I've painstakingly gone over list upon list of recommended classics and narrowed it down to the above 52, I'm actually getting a little bit excited to get started. I hope I have the time and the attention span to complete this, and hope to come out of 2011 a little more well-rounded for the accomplishment.

A Swiftly Approaching Moving Day

I hate moving.

I've done it waaaay too many times in the last few years, even across state lines. It was one thing when it was just Dan and I, but now... Addison has lived in 4 different homes in her 3 1/2 years. Needless to say, it's getting very old. Packing up our whole life and moving it to a different location never ceases to blow my mind-- reminds me of a line from a Jewel song that says "everything's temporary if you give it enough time."

The benefit this time is that it's the last, or at least the last for many, many years. We are settling on our first home purchase on Wednesday and moving Saturday, finally putting down roots for our family of 4. We bought at the top of our price range, solely because our intention was to find a place big enough and nice enough to house our family permanently; not that we are insisting this is the house we will live and die in, although it's possible... just saying we don't have any intention of moving anytime in the immediate or distant forseeable future.

Packing 2 people's stuff was hard. Packing 3 people's stuff was painful. Packing 4 people's stuff is turning out to be torturous. Addison has 3 times as many possessions as Dan and I combined, I think... and Owen's not far behind. With Dan working full time, he hasn't been able to offer much in the way of help with the packing (especially this past week, when he was on call...) and I am exhausting myself trying to get everything done. I started packing almost a month ago, knowing that whatever I could get done that far in advance would benefit me at this stage; however, I still have a lot to go.

Addison, to her credit, is being helpful in the only ways that she can-- staying out of the way, entertaining herself while I'm working, and not complaining when I pack up some of her toys (although she reminds me daily not to pack her binnie, and tells me almost every day that she can't seem to find her crocodile...). She's an old pro at moving, and it gets easier every time, although I'm glad we are moving into a house before she starts school and she doesn't have to worry about being separated from any friends. Owen has no idea what's going on... I don't think he'll even realize he's in a new house, and he'll obviously have no memories of the house that we brought him home to.

Which brings me to the emotional part... no matter how desperate I am to get out of this tiny townhouse, I will miss it desperately. It has the dual connection of being the home we regrouped as a family of 3 in, when Dan returned from Massachusetts after a year of school-imposed separation, AND it is the home where we first became a family of 4. I still feel emotional thinking about the dumpy old apartment we brought Addison home to, even though I hated every moment of the last year or so we lived there, and I suppose I will always feel emotionally connected to the home that we are leaving now.

I can't help being excited about all of the memories we're going to be making in our new house, even if it's been a long, difficult road to get there-- I think by this point, we've earned a bright, happy place for our family to grow up in. Together.

(Pictured-- our new home.)

A Not-So-Unfamiliar Conflict

When it comes to my hair, I've done it all. Super short, super long, spiky, permed, crimped, dyed... I'm not afraid to experiment. The problem is, whatever sense of vanity I have has not been able to overcome my extreme sense of laziness when it comes to my overall "look". I wear what's easy to put on and keep up, I don't often paint my nails because the idea of having to repaint them nullifies painting them in the first place, I wear minimal makeup, minimal jewelry, and above all, I like to have easy hair.

About two or so months after Owen was born, I got my hair cut. I had been keeping it on the longer side, pulling it into a low ponytail daily and wearing various "hair wrap" headbands to keep my growing bangs out of my face. But since Owen was starting to outgrow the "hold me all the time" phase, I decided I could spend an extra 5 minutes a day on my hair, and got it cut in a chin-length bob. It was much lighter and more seasonal... the 90+ degree days were making my longer 'do unimaginably hot. It didn't take long to style, and overall I was happier with my hair.

Alas, it never lasts long. Now, Addison has started school, shortening the amount of time I have every morning to get ready. Sure, I could wake up earlier, but considering I was blessed with two late sleeping children, I have been used to getting out of bed between 10 and 11 am for the past 3 years, and getting up at 7:30 to get everyone ready on school days is enough of an adjustment for me. I've taken to washing and drying my hair at night, saving time in the morning... the problem with this is I tend to wake up with hair that is completely devoid of volume, save for the amount of frizz.

It's apparent to me that this is not going to work, but now I am back to questioning what to do with my hair. Should I keep growing it out, so that pulling it back into an easy ponytail is possible? Should I get it cut shorter again, so that the bob requires slightly less styling? Should I get it all cut off again? (An option I dismiss almost immediately, as I repeatedly have promised myself I won't do it every again... however, if I could find a style that was super short but still enabled me to look feminine, I'd consider it.) My hair is thick but fine, gets greasy easily, and despite trying every product I can find, still frizzes immediately upon drying. I can't let it air dry because although it looks straight, it's not... "kinky" is the only word I can think of to describe the way it looks naturally. Not curly, not wavy, not straight... just kind of looks like I fell asleep with wet hair on a bus.

Stay tuned to see what I decide to do... and if anyone has any thoughts, I would LOVE to hear them!

A New Identity

I have been posting on this blog for almost two years now... It's always interesting to look back and see what kinds of things I wrote about back then. Addison was not-quite-one-and-a-half when I started this, and we were living in Massachusetts. I had started a different blog when we moved to Mass in January of '08, but switched to this one in September '08 because using just my name in the web address was easier for people to remember.

I called the blog "The Church Bulletin" because our last name is Church and I was starting this blog in order to give family and friends a way to keep up with us (mainly Addison) while we were living so far away. But now, 2 years later, the blog has largely become reflective of my personal thoughts and experiences, rather than an "update about the family"kind of blog (although they are often featured) , and I think it's time to change the name.

Unfortunately, I'm moving in 2 weeks and don't have the creativity or brain power to come up with anything original. So I'm asking for help. If anyone has any witty or creative suggestions for a name for my blog, post them here in the comments or as a comment on my facebook page. All ideas appreciated!

Break for Creativity

Being a mom, it should come as no surprise that I don't have much time for projects anymore. Most of my free time is put into chores, and that which isn't is spent doing as little as possible... starting anything crafty takes too much time and just creates another mess to clean up. And in our small townhouse, I have no place to set things up in any kind of useful way (which will change when we move into our new house! Yay!) But now and again, I find occasion to do something creative, which I always enjoy, even if it creates a lot of extra work.

Today, I had 2 cards to make. The first was a thank you card for a blanket that a friend made for Owen. Perfect opportunity to use the owl stamp I recently bought! (because really, who doesn't love owls?) I thought it turned out pretty cute, and I use the combination of brown and navy blue as often as I can (at least until I run out of navy blue cardstock.)

Next, I made a card for a friend who just had a baby girl. Because I know she's going to be buried in a pile of pink, I opted for a pretty-but-neutral green, cream, and blue color scheme. Sticking with the bird theme again, I thought this turned out pretty cute.

Finally, I tackled an idea that hit me walking through Michaels today-- a custom gift bag for a soon-to-be 6 year old girl. Because I am working on packing for our move and realized I buried my wrapping-paper-gift-bag tub, I decided to buy a plain white gift bag and fun tissue paper for the present I was buying. On my way to the check out I saw those long-stemmed (long sticked?) lollipops that are always super cute and an idea was born. I mean, who wouldn't be excited to get a gift bag decorated with yummy and super cute lollipops?

So although it ate up about 3 hours of my night and pushed my cleaning routine back significantly, I am very satisfied with what I was able to accomplish, and renewed my excitement at the prospect of having a space of my own in our new house to continue crafting and experimenting.

I Hate Phones

I hate phones.

I’ve pretty much always been this way. I’ve never been the one to order the pizza, never been the one to call customer service unless I have to, and always try to push responsibility off on someone else when a phone call needs to be made. If I don’t recognize your number on my caller ID, I will not answer, and if the call isn’t urgent, I will likely not call you back (often telling myself, “I’ll call back later” (to make time for a personal pep talk) and the inevitably forgetting to do so.)

I’m not sure what made me this way, but my instincts tell me that the logical explanation lies in my social awkwardness. In person, I find it difficult to start conversations with people (even people I know from time to time) and often appear snobbish due to my deeply rooted shyness. I dread the inevitable lull in conversation. I don’t feel comfortable in large groups of people, and don’t have the confidence to hold my own in a situation where I’m being introduced to someone’s friends. I would be a terrible trophy wife, and I thank God everyday that although I am sometimes forced to meet my husband’s friends in a professional setting, his outgoing personality usually overshadows the fact that I’m desperately wishing for invisibility.

The benefit is, in face-to-face conversations, I’m fairly good at reading people. Although I have a tendency to fill every moment of silence with SOME kind of babble (again, I dread a lull…) I can usually tell by a person’s expressions and body language how things are going, and generally know when I’m being boring, annoying, hilarious, etc. (And for those of you who are really good at pretending to be interested in someone’s conversation, you are to blame if I’m boring you to death or driving you crazy.) Phone conversations lack this essential element. If there is a lull in a phone conversation, I don’t know whether to try to grasp for some kind of topic to chat about, defer to you to fill the silence, or try to politely end the conversation. This causes me to go into a panic. Thus, just the thought of calling someone can cause my heartbeat to speed up and my breathing to become labored.

I can handle calling a business if I have a specific need or request that can be attended to relatively quickly, with little chit-chatting and explanation. My various jobs in the past have all required phone skills, and therefore I can handle these situations with relative ease. I can also handle a social call if I have a specific reason for calling you. But if I don’t know why you’re calling me, or if you’re “just calling to chat” and I don’t know what to talk about, I will probably avoid my phone altogether. If it can be handled by text, email, or Facebook message, you can expect to be hearing from me that way.

It’s not that I don’t like you. It’s not that I don’t want to talk to you. It’s just that, for whatever reason, the idea of talking to you on the phone terrifies me a little, whether you’re a stranger or a friend. There are few exceptions to this rule, and I don’t know how to change it. If you get a call from me, please know that I am probably hyperventilating as quietly as possible on the other end of the line, and if there is a lull and you think we should be done talking, please do me a favor and end the conversation so I don’t start crying. It’ll be easier for both of us that way.

A Ranting Kind of Day

I have 2 rants (so far) today... Have decided to share them with my followers (all 4 of you.)

First, I am a cranky driver. I'm the first to admit it. But I'm getting REALLY tired of people being really, REALLY stupid. As anyone living in Central PA right now knows, 11/15 has been under construction for several years. Recently, the turning lane from 15 north into the Camp Hill Shopping Center was removed, with 2 "no left turn" signs posted at the intersection. TWO signs, within plain sight. And yet every time I drive this stretch of road, in the left lane (being that I intend to turn left into the shopping center at the APPROPRIATE entrance) I have to slam on my brakes to avoid hitting some presumably sight-impaired driver (have I mentioned there are TWO signs??) who has decided to turn left by Panera, where there is no longer a turn lane. This happened yet again today, and in the 100+ degree heat, I decided to alert the driver of my irritation by laying on my horn and honking for a length of time that would make any Massachusetts driver proud. (If you haven't driven in Mass, you might not understand the reference, but it stands anyway.)

Secondly, another huge pet peeve of mine. If I am standing at the counter, ready to order something at any kind of eating establishment (in this particular case, the cafe counter at Barnes & Noble), do NOT ask me what I'd like, and then proceed to talk to your coworker while I'm giving you my order. If you do make this mistake, you better have super powers of multitasking and incredible hearing, because if you ask me to repeat my order, I will make you pay. Which means I will give you a death glare the ENTIRE remaining time that I am at the counter and then blog about you the minute I get home.

Am going to JoJos tonight for dinner... if I am ordering my food and the guy answers the phone in the middle of my order again (has happened SEVERAL times) it might get ugly, as I am NOT in the mood to play nice.